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Wednesday, June 4, 2008

IN THE RED FORD EXPEDITION THAT HAD BEEN PARKED OUTSIDE.

I GUESS SHE WAS HURTING INSIDE OF HERSELF.

SO AS I STARED LATER ON OUTSIDE, ACTUALLY WITH A QUICK GLANCE...THE BOSS WAS RETURNING FROM SOMEWHERE AFTER DISAPPEARING FOR OVER AN HOUR ....

THE UNDERHANDED REMARKS KEPT SHOOTING LIKE A CANON.

The boss kept asking me to pursue my duties over Nicole in reorganizing her ENTIRE COMPUTER SYSTEM & CHANGING THE NAMES OF THE BUSINESS, FILING LEGAL CASES TO RECOVER PROPERTY, ETC. ETC.

BEING THE GOOD BOSS HE IS I GUESS HE HAD TO SOOTHE HER.

He later pretended as if he was all of sudden buying lunch for EVERYONE but bought her a huge lunch and had her sit on his THRONE OF A DIRTY DESK TO EAT IT LATER ON.

Then the rude comments began to pour under people's breath toward may. I was obviously in the way.

I pay her no mind, well because my mind was pure.

and jealousy only is sparked from intimacy of some sort or stirred up by confusion. I was obviously paying no one barking up the tree of love, or orgasms, or anything else.

JUST WORK.

I then proceeded to my office.

YOU'LL UNDERSTAND SOON IN MY CONFESSION

Her REACTION was so uncalled for however ALLOWED by him It was memorable.

Why would a SECRETARY (low budget at that) throw a tantrum over 1 new employee who is obviously situated all the way in a back office?

HER JAW DROPPED IN COMPLETE DISSAPOINTMENT & OBVIOUS IRRITATION ...

ALMOST AS THOUGH SHE WANTED TO STARE INTO THE EYES OF A HUSBAND BETRAYING A WIFE.

He began to walk me over to HER 1st & foremost: Then said "Nicole...

Rachel will be working here with us now. "

"She's just a dumb little worker bee, that's all she is, don't worry"

He told me. Let's go tell her.

I'm personally not into talking about people in front of them, however behind their backs so I was already irritated.

You then explained "WE MUST TELL THE SECRETARY" "Don't worry about her actions, she's just a complete Fuck Up anyway"

He felt pressured for some reason to have to TELL HER

We sat at a table at a sales desk far away from the Secretary but she was observant...

She already knew my desk was in the back office and had already teamed up with another guy who couldn't help but make the comment, "you wouldn't want to work hidden way back here away from everyone would you?"

CONFESSION CONTINUED

Good Morning! I wasn't finished. I won't be until the liars stop utilizing me as a scapegoat.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

So after that was brushed aside, I was then pulled aside by YOU, the boss.

and told I'm going to have to announce that you actually work here now.
I begged you not to, and said please just say I'm utilizing office space, however you did it anyway.

I asked you to say I'm just hanging out because I could tell people were about to begin conspiring due to the behaviors I had observed already.

I was then harassed by an older salesman trying to pressure me into praying with him.

A piece of advice.
You can bow, sit, stand, turn cartwheels all you want, but if your only putting on a performance
then please don't try to intimidate others by embarrassing them in public with
irritating and rude comments and remarks about "You should be proud to represent Islam" and "show everyone that it is prayer time".

Okay, but we just met, I'm pregnant, I have enemies now, I have to work to hire an attorney for my kids who really need me and you are trying to start a boxing match.

1st I made a little trip to the store and spent $100.00 on redecorating MY new desk.

There was black silk material with arabic or some sort of oriental design on it. It lightened up the entire office. I had a beautiful flower arrangement (huge actually) in the corner, a huge basket with large candy bars in it for the employees, everything was scrubbed down to shine whisking the old dirt away, all files organized, the old computer cleaned and software updated, all electrical cords organized and safe.

Then I was ready to sit and relax with nothing more but my thoughts on making money. Not speaking or holding leisure conversations about personal life with anyone. It was simply a unit for me to comfortably yet professionally focus on making thousands.

Unfortunately I gained 99 1/2 % enemies within 1 hour of doing so.

We discussed my job as completely reorganizing you and the entire company.

I sat back, observed, then tried to compartmentalize what had to be undertaken.
Of course it only took a few days for everyone of your employees to bite at me trying to figure out exactly what my position was and actually verbalizing it to my face in a nagging manner.

I figured because the desk was so dirty, I had to begin by reorganizing it.

So much stuff to clean.
I thought If people actually wanted to push me to the limit I had no choice but to show them
what I am really made of to be taken seriously but tried to be not so obvious because I could foresee it would strike up jealousy.

However, In order for me to be in a focused state of mind I had no choice but to make myself feel at home. Once I did that I could conquer mountains of work.

But how do I do that with jealous employees hounded down my back?

I prepared for work the next morning.

I hate glitzy clothing. This took lots of effort out of me.
I would much rather jeans and a nasty shirt while being in control of the entire shop (allowing others to believe their in control. You know teamwork and deligation)

I spent hours PREGNANT shopping for clothes to impress YOUR rediculous employees.
was there, and communicating like normal.

Of course I was your customer, employee, and within a couple of days business partner.
So you allowed me and led me on to believe.

You assigned me a desk.
There were only two in the back office.

The one I got just happened to be yours.
So I was the only dummy who didn't understand the rude comments coming from the workers.

Call me the betrayer. There's nothing for me to lose when I'm everlong the scapegoat

Prepared ?

What does the word betray mean?

Does it only mean something to the person that wants to conceal something?
After they have harmed the emotions, dignity, self-worth and livelihood
gnawing away at their self-conscious?

Everywhere I go I get belittled like a dog. An animal. A nothing. Even jungle animals are captured on film and celebrated.

But you.
Hired me for a job when I never asked to work for you.

I was fully covered. Minding my own business with innocence and sweetness
and focus of mind on my children and my pregnancy.

Trying to move forward.

Okay I have a confession to make.

Only because the results of your rudeness toward me have sent me into complete misery and utter torment the week I'm due to be relaxed and deliver a baby.

How do I respect you when you care nothing for my existence?

Will continue in the next post.
So start whistling your favorite song.

On that note: I really do believe now...

My little girl
and my little boy
deserves to be with people who
are not me.
Someone who is of a white race or Asian.
I am too ugly to embarrass them everywhere they go.

The baby I am about to give birth to is Pakistani.
I wouldn't dare embarrass this child.
I wouldn't want the child to live life like a dog and miss out on opportunity
or success or sustenance in this world like real humans do.

I from now on, will isolate myself from the world and only
communicate if i truly need to.

I will only speak to any men who approach me.
I will never try to even smile or glance at any man to
give them any thought that I may actually want to suck their dick.

I am nothing
will be nothing
and always remain absolutely nothing.

Invisible to all but those who can find true mutuality in my friendship
presence or anything else my existence has to offer.

Their will always be police action to restrain me from
unsegregation from those I am and will never be worthy to
be around.

And because I am garbage, it will be a long lonely life.

I have at this very moment had a not so positive encounter.

This is the result.

I am an ape.
I look like an ape
I talk like an ape
I walk like an ape
I have big blow job lips
I'm only good enough to pretend as though someone is going to marry me.
I am not even worth a penny
I should stop having children for people out of my race because I'm doing injustice to mankind.
I am only good enough to be used for money if I have it.
I am not allowed to have a husband
I am not allowed to function as a mother
I am only supposed to remain homeless and dumb without education for decades or even life.
If I am simply walking into a room Im a prostitute
I shouldn't have walked into the room
It's my fault
It's not the man's fault
I am a criminal
I am a scammer
I am possibly a dog
I need to be cleaned up for presentation
I should starve to death and deserve to never utilize a telephone or walk if I ever need to go somewhere.
If I am in someone's presence never call them or I will be in very very big big trouble
because I'm a beast and a very ugly, dirty , and very bad bad person.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

DIVINITIVE BLESSINGS. SINCERE EARNEST SUMMONS TO GOD:

I'LL SPEAK ONLY IN ENGLISH. NOT TO CONFUSE THE CONFUSED.
----------

THE ENEMY -

THE SUBJECTS -

THE SITUATION -

THE OUTCOME -

Dear God the Most Merciful, accept my prayers I sincerely ask of you.
Allow me to be worthy of your presence in all endeavors of time to come.
You are God, You are Great, You are Everlasting & Everywhere.

Reject the enemy, reject their deeds, their plots, their plans, their resources for the sake of You and Your plan to care for and nourish and protect your followers. Bind them and their devils in Your name, summoning 500 tr of your soldiers to protect myself, my family, my children and our endeavors our freedom our rights without limitation and restraint of progress, happiness, potential, health, dignity, etc. etc.

Reject their proposals and shine the light on their plans stumbling their every move, money, and hate back into their field of players.

---

I sincerely request your protect the subjects at hand, accepting their (our) proposals for longevity, happiness, patience, education, spirituality, religious beliefs, freedom, honor, freedom from anxiety and strength in sanity and sanctity, allowing healing and great and excellent bills of health defeating those who are injecting and intentionally impregnating sicknesses into those they feel are inferior to themselves.

I pray and summons your protection for fearlessness, freedom, a natural, painless, healthy and safe, happy and wonderful labor and delivery.

I pray the baby and myself are not left paralyzed due to schemes premeditated by obvious and numerous attempts to suppress not only myself but previous children making and leaving horrendous and felonious, as well as fraudulent reports on the CPS records to invoke negativity, plans, plots, and the systematic common preparation of records leading to documentation for false evidences which promotes legal stealing and robbery of children for blackmarket slavery and surrogacy premeditated like the undercover business of selling humans in year 2008 without them even being aware.

I appear before you oh LORD, to take control of the situation at hand, with only 1% of one morsel of your power over all creation to protect those who are loyal and faithfull to you. You are God, You are Great, and You own and are Everything. Let the humans know they are weak such as myself and they cannot overpower YOU who created everything. You are the resources, You are the homes, You are the Health, You are the Power, and You are Just.

--

The outcome:

A safe, painless delivery for the baby, offering him the utmost of care with great exultation and happiness with good life, health and happiness with you blocking all evil eyes from this wonderful innocent little baby boy.

He has been so very patient throughout the turbulence of any traumatic events imposed and premeditated upon his temple, his growing space. They have premeditated ferrocious plots to strain him, to stress him, to cause misfortune or disfunction in him, but they are only sorry, dispicable, low life, wanting, envious, jealous individuals of whom cannot fathom what the difference between character of an animal or a human is.

They have no faith and no dignity, no understanding and no comprehension of how to look to God for answers. Only how to systematically indulge in goofiness and actions that of a complete clown, laughing and whaling around like complete outcasts at circuses.

Bless Oh Lord,

this baby's eyesight
his lips
his healthy organs
his healty features
protect his hearing
protect his body, soul, mind, spirituality and life.
With complete longevity and no complications whatsoever.

Wipe away all impurities and anxieties that have been inflicted upon him
torturing his growing space as well as himself.
Bless him with a grand entrance of love, soothing happiness, and everything he needs
to feel warm and cozy.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

From Mommy!

LET'S REMEMBER. WHERE ELSE WOULD SIMILARITIES TAKE PLACE?

The Holocaust - During World War II (1939-1945), many Palestinian Arabs and Jews joined the Allied forces. though some Palestinian and Arab leaders were sympathetic to the Nazi cause. Jews had a special motivation for fighting the Nazis because of Nazi persecution of Jews and growing suspicions that the Nazis were systematically exterminating the Jews of Europe. These suspicions were later confirmed, and the extermination of European Jews came to be known as the Holocaust. The threat of extermination also created great pressure for immigration to Palestine, but the gates of Palestine were closed by the British White Paper. In 1941 the British freed Jewish Haganah underground leaders in a general amnesty, and they joined the British in fighting the Germans.

DIVINITIVE DISCOVERY: MINDBLOWING MILESTONE

of a weekend long Honeymoon
to marry
it was a 'marriage' of convenience
of a halfbreed
ancestry or a Indian
or to do with money
of a blank check
to do with financing
factual or based on facts
of yoked.
to be yoked
to tie, link, or of a couple or a pair
youngling
of a youngster
of a couple
business or
a buss: a kiss
burnout: of a person suffering from burnout
to drive
to drop or drop and kick????
or to drink
something to drink
of a co-worker
to cover up
or of a covenant
to make a binding agreement
cover up: a device for masking or conceiling
someone who covets what another has: a complete wannabe
to court: or the act of wooing
of a cozy cabin
of espousal
of a 'wedding'
a large formal dance
or
of bald: of nudity and being naked
of a test
or test tube
or testis
or testicles
or testosterone
tete a tete: a private conversation between two persons
of terror
of compromise
or conceit
or of compound
or to comprehend something
to be the business of - to conceptualize
to be concerning or involving
of a telephone
or teaspoon or to tease
or in tears
she or he is in complete tears
OF TEAMWORK
unrequited love: not returned/one way or one-sided
wedding or of wedlock
weep or to weep
to express emotion and especially sorrow by shedding tears.
of a webcam or WWW

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